Making Mountains Out Of Mole Hills


Have you ever had a chip on your tooth, or rather, I guess you'd call it a chip out of your tooth, and your tongue won't leave it alone?


Well, that's what I have going on. I've tried to see it in my little hand held mirror, because I haven't had a bathroom mirror in weeks. 

All I know is, my tongue, seemingly with a mind of its own, will not leave it alone. And it's driving me a little crazy. 

But then the status of the bathroom is driving me a bit crazy, so I'm edgy to start with. I have been taking my showers by the light from the hallway ceiling.

What's really driving me batty is that nothing at all is being done. Five days of nothing being done! I know it is no one's fault at this point. But still, the utter aggravation!

Kenny is back at work, but is so behind on work orders that I am far, far down the line.

I started reading another book: "This Is Not Over."



It's a suspenseful tale about two women who only know one another via emails and texts. 

Miranda is a host who rents out a California cottage for infrequent stays by couples and families wanting a little vacation. 

The other woman, Dawn, is one of the clients who rented her cottage, for a long weekend getaway with her husband.

Dawn gets upset after she and her husband spend good money for this getaway, and she is quite disappointed with their stay.

In her mind, her dissatisfaction is due to things about the rental that did not meet her expectations. At least she has pin-pointed this event as being the culprit for her unhappiness.

So she writes a bad review on the site where Miranda lists her rental. Which enrages Miranda and hurts her business. Then Dawn takes it a step further.

Then they both start taking things a step further. And further.

These two women started out as decent people. But their mutual dislike starts to take over as they focus on the other as being the bearer of all bad things that are currently happening to them. 

Miranda is in her late fifties. Her husband is a doctor and makes good money. But their only child is 27 and an addict. And is a source of continual draining of her own resources.

Her husband cut him off and he thought she did too. But she cannot seem to cut all ties with her child. And so she is secretly funding what she hopes is his rent with the money she gets from renting out her parents' beach home for these getaways. 

So she needs that money. Because she cannot afford for her husband to find out what she is doing. And if something happens to her adult son, she knows she will blame herself somehow.

Dawn has gone back to school and is about to finish her degree in Communications. But as she nears the end of her education, she realizes she doesn't really know what she wants to do when she graduates. Which is making her more than a bit anxious.

She came from a poor and dysfunctional home and has tried very hard to put distance between who she was then and who she is now with her husband. 

And somehow she has come to blame Miranda for all the evils in the world. Likewise, Miranda has come to focus all her troubles on Dawn.

It is a very interesting read. I can't wait to see how they end this feud. 

It is written by Holly Brown, who is a practicing marriage and family therapist, and has a blog, Bonding Time, on Psychcentral.com. 

I imagine she has seen all manner of infighting between people as a therapist. And that comes across in the emotional actions of her moody and ambivalent characters.

In a sort of parallel way, what's happening with these two female characters is sort of what's happening with me.

With the bathroom project stalled, I find myself being apprehensive and more anxious about other things. The fact that I have no control over the situation seems to be ratcheting up my anxiety. 


And so tomorrow I will tell you about the visualization techniques I have begun again to ease me off to sleep at night. 

Twenty years ago I had books on visualization, but have somehow lost them along the way. Back then I read and read about meditation and visualization, and ways to soothe yourself when anxiety is consuming you.

For me this skill, or mindset, is very relaxing and beneficial to sleep. And I hope it will help some of you as well.

28 comments

  1. Don't wait on the tooth! You don't want a cavity to start.
    The book sounds great. And scary--we are about to start renting apartments on AirBnB.
    Good luck with the bathroom. This, too, will pass.

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    1. Yeah, this book is sort of like what you're planning to do I think. But of course this is fiction. I think it may already be a cavity because it's discolored...

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  2. That bath will get done, maybe not today but soon. Hold tight to that and Breath..
    I found something that soothes me a bit when I feel the anxiety ramping up, its call "Tapping".
    Just google it and you can do it along with the video till you can remember the steps on your own. I hope it helps ya.

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    1. I think if I could just get out. But I'm hurting so much from dealing with the outside of the patio last week that I don't think I could walk far.

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  3. What an interesting premise for a book, and one that is not all that far fetched these days.

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    1. Not at all that far-fetched! People will do and say things on social media, emails, texts, etc., that they wouldn't in person. As bloggers we all sure know that. Scary stuff!

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  4. Well, it may be a pain in the rear, but I recommend you get yourself to a dentist and have your teeth checked out sooner rather than later. You want to find that chip. If nothing else, the dentist can polish it down so there are no longer "sharp" edges that your tongue keeps going to and yeah, tongues do seem to have minds of their own at times. The rest of it, try to let it go. It will be resolved sooner or later, whether it turns out as you had planned or you do something about it yourself, as best you can. You can always put up a temporary mirror in your bathroom, if push comes to shove.

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    1. And the darned chip is right in front too. He's mudded every wall, so I'm afraid to hang anything for fear of messing something up that he might have to redo. DON'T want to go there!

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  5. Brenda if it's just a tiny chip get out the emorory board, I had the tiniest on my front tooth just enough to send my tongue into a crazy dance!

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    1. I will try that. But it kind of looks like layers, so I'll be real careful. Got to wait till I get a decent mirror to look into! Don't want to mess that up. I don't have any dental insurance.

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  6. Hope the bathroom gets some work soon...not much choice but to go with the flow, I guess.
    Love the look and function of the rake head in your first photo!

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    1. I can go with the flow for awhile. But I tend to focus on things and not be able to un-focus myself! Yeah, that rake is quite handy for utensils!

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  7. Your description of this book in IMHO is exactly how it is in real life. People react often these days in such ways. We live in a world where everyone feels they can say things they normally would never say to someone's face because it is on the web. And then things just escalate from there.

    Brenda, when I am faced with a situation in which I seem to have no control, what helps me is re-arranging the furniture or re-organizing my cupboards or closet and doing a deep clean on one room. I end up feeling much better when it is done. It is a great way to burn up those feelings of stress.






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    1. Oh, I've done all that. Rearranged the living room back to the way it was. Keep finding little projects to do. This is just a thorn in my side. I know in the big picture, it is quite minor. But I really have a hard time wondering when a person is going to come in here, because having someone in here makes me anxious. Just not knowing when he'll show up is really ratcheting the anxiety up.

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  8. "This is not over" LOL is a perfect description of your bathroom re-do. I understand COMPLETELY the issue with the chipped tooth. Get that checked when you can. Then, may I suggest lunch with a friend, or a stroll through a flea market? ANYTHING to divert your attention for just one afternoon will help.
    Also, please advise where I can locate the wire coffee cup holder in the first picture. Love it!

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    1. I have thought of doing something like that, but my ankle is not in good shape after working outside my gate last week. Also, I tried to email you, but there was no email address with your name. I got that particular cup holder at my local grocery store of all places. But I also had a smaller one I gave to Israel that I ordered from World Market. It was under $20.

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  9. I literally just chipped a tooth and had it fixed on Tuesday, so I get it! I'm sorry, it's annoying. I am normally not a big fiction reader, but this sounds like an interesting premise...unorthodox topic for sure. Might have to check this one out! Feel good!

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  10. I have had several chipped teeth that were 'bonded'....don't even know if that's the correct word. Over time the bonding chipped off too. Last time my dentist just smoothed the edges and told me to keep on going. My tongue rests on these little places all the time, so I know what you mean!!! I hope you get your bathroom completed soon. The book sounds wonderful; will check it out!

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  11. I just wanted to say "thank you" for being there every day. A lot of blogs I check aren't there for days, or weeks, or ? I can count on you for a little window on the world each day.
    I have a "sticky brain" too. Instead of letting it go on an old worry-tape, I try to re-program with insisting my brain list all the things I'm grateful for. It's getting to be quite a long list--I call it my Attitude of Gratitude. It helps.
    I hope you find your tooth is a minor fix and Kenny shows up sooner than expected.

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  12. Brenda, the Dallas News just had an article in it on how to go to sleep easier and it mentioned two things that work for me. First, take 6 deep breaths as you lay in bed, 6 counts as you breath in and 4 as you let breath out. (Already you are concentrating on something besides your worries!) Then, think of the most wonderful time you have ever had and relive it in your mind. The article's author's said his was when he was a Boy Scout at a camp out in the forest and thinking of one night when it time for sleep in the tent and he was just enjoying goofing off with the other Scouts and the overall feeling of happiness he had being among the wilderness with friends. Then concentrate on the breathing again. He also said that practicing the breathing counts during the day was helpful, too, because most people breathe too shallow and breathing deeply gets more air to the brain through your bloodstream which helps stress.Surely works for me!

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  13. Brenda, please try EFT (Emotional Freedom Therapy/Technology)... just search for EFT and Gary Craig, the founder. It is a median tapping method.. very easy and the results are amazing. I used it a few years ago for my anxiety and it saved me. I use it occasionally still, when I'm stressed or upset or fearful about something (like going to the dentist!)... and it works so great..... like taking a Valium when you're done and it only takes a few minutes. There are DVD's and books on it. Good luck! Marilyn

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  14. Oh Brenda, I hope you get your bath fixed soon. Sometimes my brain gets fixed on one thing and I feel my anxiety rise. Sometimes I will dance and sing, out loud, like no one is watching. The physical exercise helps my body and the singing helps my soul. Don't laugh... give it a try!

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  15. You need to get to the dentist ASAP about that chipped tooth. Since you don't have insurance, hopefully you can find a dentist that will take payments. I fall asleep easily with concentrated breathing and visualization. My problem is staying asleep. I am wide awake every few hours.

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  16. oh i know how you feel!!!! that book sounds so interesting and like something i would enjoy! hope things are getting better for you, brenda!

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  17. A couple of weeks ago I had a front tooth pop out of my upper denture..it just popped out while I was eating..thank goodness I didn't swallow it!..I haven't found anyone local to fix it and my tounge will not leave it alone..lol..I guess I will have to call my former dentist and she if she knows where I can go..I had such high hopes for your bathroom remodel Brenda..try to hang in there!

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  18. NancyblueMoon: I know this sounds crazy, but my ex husband had that happen to him and he used superglue and glued it and it worked just fine.

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  19. Thanks CLG..had that suggested to me...also think my ex father in law used to do that..I really believe that would work but also afraid it might pop out again and I might swallow it and lose it...I guess I will try to find the price for having it fixed first and then decide...

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