Where You Are In Life

It was mostly overcast yesterday, which was nice. I went out early and watered and kept an eye on things on the patio. Cement heats up quickly!
I actually spent most of the day back in the bedroom. If I'm back there, I don't end up doing as much lifting. 

Both Charlie and Abi often need help getting up on the couch with me. So I end up having to get up and lift them up. Abi isn't very heavy. But Charlie is a little chunker. 

I am finding more and more lately that decorating blogs I once loved just don't stir my interest much anymore. I know it's fun to renovate and redo and add on. But it's just not where I am in life.
I guess it's how my daughter and I look at our vehicles, which we've talked about often. 

She has an SUV that isn't as old as mine is, which is 11 years old. But she has no desire to go out and trade hers in for a new car just because it's long paid off and she can afford to.

She has always been very frugal. She saw the need to save back when she was a teen, which always impressed me. 

She has a big beautiful house that I have no desire for, but she is at a different stage in her life. I once wanted that too. That day is past. 

She has a housekeeper come in once a week because they're busy with their careers. I once had a housekeeper myself when I had a home with two levels and more money. 

I suppose it depends on what stage of life you happen to be in.

I don't want the upkeep of a larger home. I don't want to have to clean a larger home. 

I see a lot of bloggers my age or older that still desire the larger homes. And that is great if you are still in shape to take care of it. 

I just desire "simple" now. 

I do love to garden on the patio, and that's not something I have to do. But gardening in any form has always fed my soul, so to speak. I know some of you know that feeling.

But cleaning a house just doesn't rise to that level!

So if you like a large home and don't mind taking care of it, or if you have outside help with it, that's wonderful. Nothing at all wrong with that.

Just not something I desire. Not at this stage in my life.

I don't care how old my vehicle is. I only have 44,000 miles on an 11 year old car. 

It is my hope that I have quite a few more years driving it. I am lucky that I've had to do very little with this car, and for that I'm quite thankful.

I don't see the point in buying a new car unless something is wrong with the one you already have. But that's just how I view things.

Where do you fall on the home and car spectrum? Are you in the mood to downsize? Already done it? 

Love the feel and smell of a brand new car?



  1. You know I desire to downsize, but you know who is not on board with that. With the housing market going up, up, up here he said we would have to put as much in a new house now as we did 22 years ago. He is trying to pay this one off before he retires. I have never had any help with cleaning the house or any help with the yard, but that day will come. I told him when I can't do it anymore we will hire people. My husband thinks like you about a car. He says to drive it till the wheels fall off. I like a new car, but the one I have is only a few years old and paid off so maybe later I'll get a new one, but no time soon.

  2. My car is 18 years old and runs beautifully. Of course, it doesn't have all the bells & whistles that the new ones do, but I'm with you on "if it ain't broke, why change!" Have a great weekend and I'm hoping for some cooler temperatures too!

  3. I felt this way about a year n a half ago. It was like-- ENOUGH already. I kept what I loved, got rid of the rest.I have it decorated just the way I like it and don't feel the need to change things around or swap out color schemes 5 or 6 times a year. I try not to think about all the time and money I wasted through the years. Enjoy your peace and tranquility.

  4. I'm with you, Brenda. I am ready to downsize. I have had huge homes over the years..this one is especially large and I am ready to simplify my life with a smaller home which will happen next spring when we close on this house.

    I have a large SUV with 140,000 miles on it (and it isn't all that old) but I run grandkids all the time and drive back and forth to IN and FL so need a good, safe vehicle to do it. IF I had my choice I would love a VW Beetle convertible. lol...right back where I started from.

    Have a wonderful weekend, Brenda. xo Diana

  5. I'm right there with you Brenda! When I worked full time, I had a housekeeper who came in every two weeks, and I kept a new car. Now that I have retired, I love keeping my own house and I am driving a 2009 Honda civic that serves me well! I no longer desire the latest in home decor; I keep what I like. I actually prefer this stage in life!

  6. I too have lost interest in many of the decorating blogs. Because their blog is based on decorating I feel they are in a constant state of remodel, remaking and redoing. After awhile I simply don't care how you reimagined your guest room! Perhaps it is because of the expense and feeling
    of constant change......I just want to live, learn and love-being in a state of constant change raises my anxiety levels. (And quite frankly I feel there are worthier pursuits in life than seeking out the perfect pillow shams for a guest room that is seldom used😉).

    1. I am so glad you wrote this reply! While I love design, I have been amazed at the people who change their bedding in their 3 guest rooms monthly! I know it is to keep an active "blog" but really seems so out of touch with real life! I, too, have stopped reading many blogs where emphasis is on newer, better, things!

  7. I love my new home because it is closer to family and I love, love, love the pool. I've done the car things, now I just love my little suv and what all it can haul and where it can take me. I don't need anything new.

  8. my mother and grandmother were of old New England stock.
    when I was three years old I could quote you the old saying...
    'use it up. wear it out. make it do or do without!' LOL!
    so you know where I land on your question.
    I have loved the beauty of simplicity and have lived it ever since I read Thoreau when I was 16 years old. it's beautiful. and restful. and happy. contentment is wonderful. at least to me.

  9. We bought a new car a couple of years ago after 12 years with a Mercy Mountaineer that I loved. Interesting that my husband insisted on a new car, but has mentioned, in hindsight, that we could have kept the other a while longer. True, but the new one does have more safety features which helps rationalize the new purchase. It's all about compromise. It's interesting that you are simplifying while I seem to be coming more involved with new technology. Thanks for helping provide balance to a fast paced world. I enjoy your blog.

  10. We downsized about 8 years ago. I don't miss my very large house for this smaller one. I can clean it myself which just keeps me moving and active. I don't get a lot of joy doing housework so I'm happy with our smaller space. I'd much rather be gardening.
    I am the type of person who wants a car that works when it should. Not impressed with the fancier ones I see in our neighborhood. We will drive this one for as long as it runs ok!
    Have a great day Brenda

  11. My husband and I are still in the big house. It is seeming bigger every day now that the kids have flown the nest. We are finding that the garden is becoming more of a chore especially in this hot, humid weather. We have begun talking about downsizing. Just trying to figure out where we want to go from here. Right now we are clueless. I'll be curious to read about others who have already downsized.

  12. As you already know, I have downsized from a home to an apartment after my divorce. Then in April of this year I moved to a senior property, and now have a very small one bedroom unit.

    I have purged a great deal and am finding that I no longer have the urge to redecorate as I used to. I even sold my small table and chairs and bought a desk which I keep my laptop on, and I mostly eat at the desk as I use the computer.

    I have unsubscribed from a few blogs which no longer fit my current lifestyle. Now that I no longer have a hutch to decorate with plates, etc, and no table to change out tablecloths, placemats and china, life is so much simpler. I got to my daughters or granddaughters home for family get togethers and so no longer entertain.

  13. I'm with you 100% Brenda! I too had the big house and all the trimmings that go with it. Spent years as an Opera singer,which was very exciting and exhausting at the same time. Now, due to disabilities I live in a one level home and spend most my of my time resting in bed. My car is now 16 years old but I rarely drive out of town. Your blog makes my day Brenda! Don't run out of the Calgon!😊

  14. Brenda, like you, been there, done that. We have downsized and we're happy. I do still have someone come in every couple weeks to do a thorough cleaning. I HATE house cleaning. I do a lot of cooking (my husband is on a low sodium diet so I make most everything from scratch) and gardening. That's enough for me. Cars are basic necessities of life at this point. Doesn't mean I don't dream of owning a convertible on those beautiful days. But those beautiful days are few and far between. Maybe if I lived in a different climate.

  15. I agree with you! At my age, I have all the "stuff" I need/like. I'm mostly following blogs that show vignettes. That's one of the reasons I like your blog. That and I still covet your red polka dot bowls. . . . .

  16. I have a large house that I would like to downsize - but I'm having trouble finding something in this market that I like just as much. If I do I will have to sell this house and then put almost all of it into a smaller house with less property...and I don't want to do that. I focus on purging things I no longer need and getting organized and downsizing the inside. That way if the time comes where I do find something I like and am ready to make the move I will already have everything purged and gone and I can simply move!

    As far as cars go I drive them till the wheels fall off. I buy quality and then keep it maintained. My last car was 12 years old when I got rid of it, and it was because the electronics were going. If it would last 20 years then by gosh I would keep it 20 years!

  17. We have old vehicles with lots of miles, but they are paid for, and that is what I like most about them! We have a small 1950-era house, about 950 square feet. It is a nice size for two people. The yard is too big, however, at one-third acre. At some point we will move to a place with less yard to care for. When I look at blogs, I am looking more for personality and getting to know the person. The blogs I enjoy are ones where the décor of their homes really seems to reflect their personality, and doesn't seem to be about the latest trends. It's OK with me if you don't feel up to doing some redecorating right now -- it's too darn hot to do much of anything nowadays. It's getting up to 84 degrees here today, which is like a cool spell!

  18. Hi Brenda, I have been reading your blog for awhile and this is my first comment. I'm a 55yo divorced empty nester living a one bedroom apt with a huge balcony in Central PA. I really enjoy the turn your blog has taken. Homemaking, simple living, container gardening, helping others and enjoying life is where I am at right now. I also love to read, just like you. Your posts make me feel like talking to an old friend and kindred spirit. Thank you.

  19. I understand...we drive our cars until they have to be hauled away. The home we live in now has too many bedrooms and not enough living space when our family is here. And there's too much upkeep...which is too hard to do. When we move to the lake, I just don't want to have to do work all the time...I'm ready for simple, too.

  20. I loved this blog post! Thank you for putting into words what I'm sure a lot of us feel. Like you, I have found that I only read a handful of decorating blogs now where I used to loyally follow a long list of them. I still have a lot of square footage but am slowly saying goodbye to the "layers" - table runners, heavy curtains, shelves full of unused dishes and plates, etc. Suddenly the items that I had worked for decades to collect became suffocating. Thank you again for your post!!!

  21. DH and I downsized 5 years ago, from a two story home, on a water front lot, located on two acres. We had lived there 30 years, when our 3 boys were growing up. Now we live in a new mobile home, that we had custom built, and I could not be happier. Never thought I'd say that, I was so against a mobile home, but life could not be better. Have my craft room, with 4 book shelves full of my books, 2 book shelves with stuff in cigar boxes (charms odds and ends, parts of jewelry,ribbon, and then an antique toy collection. A couple of long tables to work on my rubber stamping and water coloring, and the other for my computer and bill paying, and TV. Made sure I had a big walk in closet filled with card stock, rubber stamps, and accessories for making cards. It is the biggest bed room of three, and DH was good with the idea that it would "all" be mine. (grin) So I have everything I need too, in a small home, with a flower bed in the yard,and pots of flowers on the decks. At my age (77) it really is the best...Love reading about small home living, and have always loved reading your blog, Brenda. It is one of the BEST!!!

    1. Bonnie, you sound like a girl after my own heart. I live in a small space 950 sq. ft.but we are thinking about a double wide in an over 55 development. No grass to cut so I have more time for paper crafts, making my own cards and tending to my flower pots. Give me a good cup of tea and a good book too. Enjoy your day.

  22. Strange isn't it that things that once seemed important no longer have the same catchet they once had. My home isn't large or grand. It was an old farm house and we have patched, primed and added on over the 40 + years we have lived here.I like to think it has charm but I don't have granite counter tops, or beige/ white everything, and there's plenty of shabby around, but not so much chic. The glossier blogs have lost me lately too, as they all seem to be so much alike.

  23. I am with you 100%. I enjoy my small little condo. It is just right for me. I use the things I already have to change things out when I want a little change. I still have to work part-time to make ends meet. But I have summers off since I work in public education. I don't read as many blogs any more. DIY and Home Decor just does not interest me anymore. I love your blog because you are "real". I like readin about every day life. I enjoy seeing other people's homes, but I enjoy hearing about the everyday life of those who live within the beautifully decorated walls. Life changes for everyone. I enjoy where I a in my life. Karie

  24. I've done the downsizing although it continues since I love 'stuff' but must get rid of it constantly so it doesn't overwhelm me. I also have always driven cars until they won't go anymore. My CR-V has 110,000 miles on it and still runs great. We did buy a brand new car for Mom to get in and our of easier but that was the only reason. She loved her Rav-4. My daughter got it and loves it now. I can't clean like I use to with some issues I have so once a month we have someone clean both duplexes(bathrooms, floors and kitchen especially) and that really helps. I find I really am drawn to the blogs where I made a friend, like you! Hugs!

  25. DH and I have 'house' down-sized already; now I want to downsize yard space and work...
    A car is a means to get from A to B... as longs as it runs well, who needs new?!?!

  26. I love watching the Tiny Homes and would like to do that, but my husband is apparently at a different stage of life than I am. It seems the older we get, the more our world shrinks and the less we need to complicate it. I could handle that when I was younger, but not now. My biggest desire is peace--but life seems to get in the way. :-) I enjoy hearing about your Abi and "chunky" Charlie.

  27. I've never lived anywhere that was larger than two bedrooms/one bathroom. I grew up in a one-bedroom house with my mother and sister. We even had a lodger at one point!

    I love looking at blogs of large, beautiful homes but I wouldn't want one unless I could afford household help to come every other day.

    I've been living in a 2-bedroom/1-bathroom ranch since 1984. My husband and I both agreed we didn't want to be a slave to a house, upkeep-wise or dollar-wise. We only had one child so we never outgrew this house.

    I do wish I had more closets as there are only 3 here, and also a half-bath. Other than that, my house is perfect for me.

    My vehicle is a 2003 and has about 50,000 mile it and looks brand new so I intend to keep driving it for a long time yet.

  28. Totally with you on all points. The older I get, the more I want simplicity in my life. Both my husband and I have never been the materialistic, "have to have bigger and better" types. We've lived in this small ranch house for 27 years. It suited our needs raising two boys and it still suits our needs now. We can easily keep up with the yard work, as it's a small yard. My Honda Accord is 16 years old and still runs like a dream! It has 155K miles on it. Have never had a problem except for routine maintenance. Hubby's car is a 2008 Toyota Corolla with 210K miles on it! He drives 28 miles each way to and from work. Again, never a problem with this car except for the usual maintenance and wear and tear stuff. Neither one of us have a desire for a new car until we absolutely have to have one (when our cars "die"). We hate car payments!

  29. My SUV turned "Sweet 16" this past April. Still drive it everywhere! The funny thing is my husband is a general manager at a car dealer! I would love to downsize my house but until my husband retires we will stay put.

  30. Well look at us, kindred minds all. We moved to our current home, a cape cod, thinking it was smaller. After 3 years we've come to the conclusion that it's still too big. Pray tell, why a living room AND a great room? There's still too much 'stuff', but we both enjoy our hobbies and we're still able to get around, so I suppose we're here until we're not. And as for cars, my 20 y/o Camry fills the bill...low milage, super pick up...dealers always ask if I'm interested in selling. And the glamor blogs? I know many of these young gals are so proud of their lovely homes and well they should be, but there's a neighborhood near ours where the mentality seems to be 'my house is bigger than your house'. 'Nuf said.

  31. I bought my first (and probably last) brand new car in '12. It was a yellow Volkswagon Beetle that I named Buttercup. I love that car and will drive it as long as possible.
    I still live in the 2 story 2,000 square foot home with a large yard that I raised my 3 kids in but I am SO ready to downsize to something smaller all on one level. Just haven't been able to afford to move.

  32. I've never been a big house girl, so no need to downsize, but I have to say I need less stuff now. I don't want to spend my days managing knick knacks and dusting figurines. A few simple things and I'm good. As far as the cars go, yup, I'm with you. Buy them and keep them until they don't run well any longer. No need for new, unless there is a need. Enjoy the weekend!

  33. I've never had a big house and never desired one either. I grew up in a 750 square foot house, and raised my own two daughters in a 950 square foot house. My husband and I now live in a small cabin by a lake. It is tiny as well with 2 bedrooms and 1 bathroom. I love the coziness of our home and the beautiful scenery all around us. I couldn't want for more. I have a veggie and herb garden in containers on our back patio and our front porch is filled with flowers.
    When we both retired we downsized to one car, which we bought new but will drive until the wheels fall off!
    I only visit a handful of blogs these days as I only relate to the ones that are of a simpler lifestyle like mine. I do enjoy your blog so much, Brenda! And I sure relate to chunky dogs - I have a Pug that only my husband can pick up as he is too heavy for me!

  34. I've pretty much always lived simply and frugally. I do have too much "stuff" that I'm determined to go through and weed out the things I don't love or need any longer. I love to go to flea markets, but I don't buy anything unless it's something I can't live without or a very good bargain. My idea of decorating is along the comfy, cozy lines. Too many big houses I see today, while beautiful, look more like they are decorated for a magazine shoot rather than looking lived in.
    As for our vehicles, I drive a Camry with 140,000 miles and have been assured by the mechanics where I take it in regularly for oil changes and checkups that it'll last many more miles. Hubby's pickup is older than my car, but it looks good and the mileage is relatively low. He is like me and doesn't feel the need to trade unless it's necessary.
    Interesting post and comments! Have a nice weekend.

  35. As you know Brenda we moved to East Texas about 1 1/2 yrs ago now due to medical reasons and we are very content with a smaller home now. We have 2 bedrooms and 1 1/2 baths, really one bedroom too many but it's there for guests just in case. I very rarely leave the house unless it is to take my husband to MD Anderson for treatment or to the store so I do spend most of my time outside enjoying the flowers which I love, it brings me peace. My focus is no longer on decorating even tho I do still enjoy fixing up my home but I am not obsessed with changing things up all the time. I like making it comfortable for my husband and myself and it is what it is. I haven't even blogged for a year until just recently. Our car is a 2007 Honda CRV with 89,000 miles, still running great so no new car in the foreseeable future.

  36. I am not very status conscious. My car, like yours, is 11 years old. I wish it would last for the rest of my life but that would be sort of a miracle.
    I'm sick of being a slave to objects/ things that require a level of attention greater than the joy they give to me. The largest house I've had was 3,600 sq feet but it didn't have good function. The one I have now has a yard I cannot keep up with. I feel like I've lost control. Some years ago I had a tiny short term rental cottage that was so functional. It made everything easy for me. I know I will never have that again.

  37. Hi Brenda: We have already downsized and I thought I would be happy, but it is still big in my mind. It's only 900 sq ft, but it's just the two of us. Then it happened.....we bought a used 5th wheel and it is small, just big enough for us. We are in the process of fixing it up to suit our needs, and I find myself wanting to stay in it and leave the house, well, I guess I kinda did cuz I been working on it since June and I love it. BUT it doesn't come with a garage, where my husbands heart still is. He loves to tinker with cars so back to the little cottage to take care of.

  38. Brenda, I resonate so much with what you say about wanting "simple" at this stage in your life. I live in a small, three bedroom--four if you count the one in the finished basement-- house and it is packed pretty full. I have a quite a large yard and it really is too much for me to take care of alone. My daughter, who lives with me right now, helps a lot with the yard and does many things in the house, too. But, she may decide to have her own place at some point. So, I know eventually I will move to a smaller place. I am working on sorting and getting rid of things that I don't really want or need. It's a process, believe me, after thirty-two years in this place! But I am committed to moving toward a house with less clutter and less up-keep. I've always wanted to live in a big, old house--a beautiful Victorian or a bungalow, but at this point I know I never will and I wouldn't be able to afford or take care of it anyway. I've never had a housekeeper but even with this small house I'd love one because there are so many things I'd rather do than clean! As it is, I do what I can and don't worry about what doesn't get done! I do love to garden and hope I will be able to find a smaller place that will allow me to do that. You are very lucky to have your patio for growing your plants.

    If I remember correctly, I don't think I have ever owned a brand new car. I don't think it is worth it to spend the money you have to for a new car when it will be worth so much less in such short order. I don't even own a car right now, which I don't like at all. I am hoping to find one before long, but it won't be new. I will look for something a few years old--even ten, if the mileage is low. Hopefully, I will find something that is both comfortable for me and gets decent gas mileage.

    I don't think that I have ever, really, cared too much about owning a huge house or a brand new car every few years. I like my old furniture--family pieces--just fine, too.
    So, I'm with you and your desire for less to take care of and to possess. You're on the right track, I think, for where you are in your life.

  39. I rent a small cottage for 700.00 a month with a private backyard that is as big as my 730 SQ ft. cottage. My landlord lets me do whatever I want as so long I don't bug him too much. I can paint bathroom cabinets, kitchen cabinets, tear out grass...build gardens...and he never raises my rent. No way am I going to move to a bigger house. I love the coziness of my little cottage. I like my neighbors, they look out for me and I them. I bought a brand new car after driving a 14 year old car that was ready to cost me a ton of money to "save" it. I am quite happy with my new car and I certainly deserve it. My new car will be 1 year old in September and it has only 3700 miles on it. I say she will last me quite sometime.

  40. I read this post on my phone the other day and am so glad I got to come back to it tonight and get to read all the comments too. As you probably know, I am so happy living in a small cottage now compared to the big one we rented in FL from our daughter for 9 months last year. And even though I loved our farmhouse before that one, I am as happy as cricket living in the smallest house we've lived in since we were first married over 50 years ago. I love everything handy, not having to walk far from room to room. I even love having just one bathroom to clean compared to the 4 in FL. However, if we can add another toilet and sink someday that will be very much appreciated. I love having a galley kitchen where I just turn from sink to stove to fridge to pots and pans, etc. I can clean it in a jiffy. A small house just seems friendly to me now, even when our son and his family come in town to visit. I think we "see" each other better, we feel as if we've really visited by the time they leave. I could go on and on but it boils down to I just love small houses. And as far as cars go, my favorite is one that is paid for!

  41. I have a friend who -whenever he plays for a big lottery - always promises me - "Jean, I'll move you back here and BUY YOU A BIG HOUSE!" to which I always correct him: I've had houses, and I found that unless you can do the repairs, are married or partnered with someone who can, or you can afford to hire someone - they're black holes for whatever money you have! So - get me a condo with excellent management, please :>


I always enjoy reading your comments and having you join the conversation here at Cozy Little House. It is like having a gathering of friends sitting in my cozy apartment. Enjoying coffee and dessert, chatting and having a good time. I appreciate each and every one of you!


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Brenda has been writing since grade school. She majored in professional writing/journalism in college, where she won awards for her feature writing. She loves to decorate, garden, enjoy nature, read and spend time with her Yorkies.


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